Help a Brother Out
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
On Saturday we were at a bar and my single friend got hit on by a gentleman. Now some of you may call him a gentleman or some of you may have called him a "creepy old dude with serious mental issues." I would then say to you to stop being so mean and give peace a chance. My other friend and I saw this going n and we did nothing to intervene. That's right we just ignored it. We did not go in and save the day or "cockblock" if you will. No one likes the blocking of the rooster. I, in fact, actually turned around and had my back to her. After he finally left we asked her if she mad ea love connection.
Be back in 2 and 2.
She then called us "asses" for not saving her from this monster of an individual. We responded with, "Hey maybe you had something going on" or " We don't want to ruin your game son." We went back and forth and the two of us guys were laughing hysterically. Hey, I'm not your superman. So I decided to make a chart to help us guys understand when we are supposed to butt into situations when strange guys hit on our single female friends. Guys this is a PSA for you. Consider it a pay it forward situation. No, I'm not sure what that means either.
See if I had this chart I would have known what to do. How are us men supposed to read people's minds? Who do we look like? Mel Gibson? I don't understand these "rules". So I've made it easier on everyone. Follow this and your nights with your single friends you will never sleep with will be easier and more enjoyable for all.
Take notes.
Click on image to enlarge.
20 comments:
That's incredibly thorough...
all you need to know ask yourself is "is your friend looking at you?"
yes- go help
no- scurry away.
your way is better though.
Tell your female friends to yell at these men. They tend to run away scared.
Ok most do, not all.
Scratch that I like your way.
Love the flow chart. Well done!
However, I almost didn't finish reading for laughing so hard at the "What am I, Mel Gibson?" comment.
:-)
Love the chart, i made it to the bottom and wow you're an evil genius, my friend. Haha.
Did you just reference What Women Want in this post?
I usually just laugh in the corner at my friends unless things really start looking desperate. They do the same to me.
Note to self: Never ever go anywhere with you.
Excellent advice - you should probably write a book.
I'd buy that.
I think this chart needs to be laminated and passed out to all men.
The flowchart for whether or not you rescue your male friend would be much more concise, although there might be some considerations for how hard you laugh at him and if there should be pictures taken.
You cannot come to the bar with me ever. Like, ever ever. Sorry. I know you had your hopes up.
Whatever! If a girl can't figure out how to escape a guy on her own, she has bigger problems. Tell her to stop being a little baby.
um this is amazing. i may share this with several male friends of mine, it's so useful.
I have printed this out and laminated it. All I need now is some single friends that are girls. Or any friends. A pet rock would be nice.
I agree with BWP. Girls suck. handle your business, bitches. We'd all be getting more penis and vagina, respectively.
Or, just sleep with your single friend and in the years of awkwardness which follow the two of you will never be seen out in public ever again.
With hindsight I can't actually recommend this option with any enthusiasm.
Wow. Whoever did this knows nothing about flow charts. It simply doesn't make any sense. All of those shapes mean something, and every single one of them is used incorrectly. Hope this guy doesn't get hit on by somebody who's computer literate.
This would come in handy if I had friends.
I cry sometimes.
You could just asked your female friend in front of creepy guy if the tests results came back positive. It's worked for me in the past.
I just have to say a few months ago my awkward friendship guy let a guy who was very weird sniff me. He came by once and said "who smells so good??" and then the 2nd time he sniffed me and Dean got up from the table!! Who does that?!? Then the guy sniffed me by my neck as I was moving away from him. I was sitting down, he was behind my chair. When Dean got back I was like "WTF?!?" and he said "Ooh sorry. I didn't want to ruin something." The guy was like 50 and creepy.
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